[That's not what he wants. He doesn't want to be told he's right — even if it might have been something he'd chased in the past, to the detriment of everyone around him. But he didn't have Jonas in his life back then. He didn't have Noctis. He just had whatever shitty hand life dealt him, forced to cope with it alone.
Reading that list doesn't feel like winning. It just makes these ugly emotions in him deepen further, jealousy and hurt and anger twisted into an unrecognizable mess. He saw this coming a mile away and he did nothing to stop it, so it's his fault too. There's so much in what Jonas lists that he could further argue, so much that could drive him into a spiral of doubt and insecurity as he imagines the two of them together, without him. Wouldn't they be happier?
It seemed like the right choice at the time. But now he's looking back at all the mean words they've said to each other and he doesn't think so, after all.]
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Reading that list doesn't feel like winning. It just makes these ugly emotions in him deepen further, jealousy and hurt and anger twisted into an unrecognizable mess. He saw this coming a mile away and he did nothing to stop it, so it's his fault too. There's so much in what Jonas lists that he could further argue, so much that could drive him into a spiral of doubt and insecurity as he imagines the two of them together, without him. Wouldn't they be happier?
It seemed like the right choice at the time. But now he's looking back at all the mean words they've said to each other and he doesn't think so, after all.]
fine
i need some space too.